He Made Women Gentle And Soft …

He Made Women Gentle And Soft ...

Reading is one of my absolute favorite pastimes.  For years now, I have been fan of the historical novels that were authored by G.A. Henty.  Mr. Henty wrote over a hundred books in the mid to late 1800s and nearly all of them are historical fiction.  Being that history is a favorite topic of mine, I thoroughly enjoy these books and was oh so excited when I could get over eighty of them on my Kindle for free!

As I was reading one of the books awhile back, I came across the following paragraphs.  They contain an immense amount of truth … truth that many people, sadly, do not realize, recognize or accept.

In the story, we are introduced to a traveling showman who cared for his orphan granddaughter who was about five years old.  At this point in the narrative, he had made arrangements for a widowed schoolteacher to take care of her for a few years and train her to be a lady.

“But why am I to stop with that lady, grampa, and not go about with you any more?  I shan’t like it.  I like going about, though I get so tired sometimes when you are showing the pictures; and I like being with you.  It isn’t ’cause I have been naughty, is it?  ‘Cause I fell out of the boat into the water?  I won’t never get into a boat again, and I didn’t mean to fall out, you know.”

“No, Aggie, it’s not that,” the sergeant said.  “You are always a good girl–at least, not always, because you sometimes get into passions, you know.  Still, altogether you are are good little girl.  Still, you see, you can’t always be going about the country with me.”

“But why not, grampa?”

“Well, my dear, because great girls can’t go about the country like men.  It wouldn’t be right and proper they should.”

“Why shouldn’t it be, grampa?” the child persisted.

“Well, Aggie, I can’t exactly explain to you why, but so it is.  Men and boys have to work.  They go about in ships, or as soldiers to fight for their country, just as I did.  Girls and women have to stop at home, and keep house, and nurse babies, and that sort of thing.  God made man to be hard and rough, and to work and go about.  He made women gentle and soft, to stop at home and make things comfortable.”

Aggie meditated for some distance, in silence, upon this view of the case.

“But I have seen women working in the fields, grampa, and some of them didn’t seem very soft and gentle.”

“No, Aggie, things don’t always go just as they ought to do; and you see, when people are poor, and men can’t earn enough wages, then their wives and daughters have to help; and then, you see, they get rough, more like men, because they are not doing their proper work.  But I want you to grow up soft and gentle, and so, for a time, I want you to live with that lady with the nice boy who pulled you out of the water, and they will make you very happy, and I shall come and see you sometime.”

-G.A. Henty, With Wolfe In Canada

He Made Women Gentle And Soft ...

I think Mr. Henty hit on a valuable truth here that many women are missing in this day and age. “God made men to be hard and rough, and to work and go about.  He made women gentle and soft, to stop at home … to keep house, nurse babies … and make things comfortable.” Somehow this sounds strikingly similar to a certain passage of Scripture: “that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.” – Titus 2:4-5

When women have to work to earn wages and provide for their families, they become more rough, more like men, because they are not doing their proper work.  Remember way back in the Garden of Eden … after Adam and Eve had sinned and they were each given specific curses?  The curse of the man was that he would have to work hard, toiling for provisions.

Have you noticed how so many women today seem so masculine?  Have you recognized how rare it is to find beautiful, gentle, soft, feminine women?  As Mr. Henty noted, when women have to work to provide for themselves and their families, they take on the curse of man and become more like men.

Some women are in this position out of necessity … my heart goes out to these women and I hope and pray that their circumstances can change.  Some women are in this position out of their own choice and free will … I hope and pray that they will see the blessing and privilege of being women at home, soft and gentle, fulfilling the role for which they were created.

10 thoughts on “He Made Women Gentle And Soft …

  1. An excellent article! I loved the quote from Mr. Henty’s book! You are right, too, about how when a woman works outside her God-given calling, or as Mr. Henty said, not doing her proper work, they take on a rough edge, and lose some, if not all, of their natural softness. When our daughter worked outside her home, she, too, began to become a little rough. I am so glad now that she is staying home and her softness has returned. The more I read SSM and this blog, the more I am convinced that a woman’s place is in the home. That saying used to make my hackles rise, but that was when I was being rebellious and almost buying into woman’s lib. I thank my Abba that He saved me from myself!

    1. Wow – you don’t know what a blessing it was to read your last two sentences! I am SO thankful that “the blessing of being at home” has been a part of my life since an early age. Now that I have become the main “errand-runner” in the family, I realize how unpleasant it must be to have to go out into the world every day! After a few hours in town, I miss the beauty, the peace, the security of our home dreadfully and can’t wait to get back to it!

  2. Thank you, Hannah, for this lovely article! I have read and re-read it many times as it is so encouraging. I am putting together special articles like this for my daughter and my granddaughters, and this one will definitely have a place among them!

    Since I found your website a few months ago, I have so enjoyed reading your blogs and I check in every day to see what you and the ladies in your family are sharing. Every one is special! You are doing a marvelous work, and I thank you again 🙂

    1. Thank you for commenting – it is a blessing to hear that this was encouraging. That quote was one that really stood out to me … most of the material in Mr. Henty’s books revolves around military history (which I happen to find fascinating!) but when I read those paragraphs, it was as if they leapt off the page! It was such a simple and beautiful way of describing the woman’s role! That’s such a neat idea to put together articles for your daughter and granddaughters – I am thinking about compiling some of the articles that have been a blessing in my life and storing them in my hope chest 🙂

  3. Thank you Hannah, I needed that. Just recently our family had to move due to my husband unable to secure work. For the first time we have absolutly no income, this state is humbling. People think my husband is foolish to not encourage his wife and daughters to work because of the state that we are in. Well, God work it out in a mighty way, my grandmother who had a stroke about 5 years ago has gotten to point where she can’t talk, she can’t cook for herself or bath herself. My mom has gotten weary of caring for her and the doctor has recommended that she has 24 hour care or be put in a rest home. Well my husband said why don’t we live with her and we care for her. We prayed about it and God open the door. It was interested how God previously placed us in circumstances where a lady at church ask if my daughters and I can clean her once a week and another family went on vacation and needed someone to stay with their aging sister ( who didn’t speak any English at all) and they asked us to care for her. Each experience prepared me for this grand service of taking care of my grandmother. I am so gratiful that I can still do a woman’s work. Please pray that my husband can find work in the same city so we can stay with her and she doesn’t have to go into a rest home because that was not her wishes and God’s word says to honor your parents and care for the widows in your family.

  4. I’ve noticed many millennial women are NOT pretty in the true sense. Since I live in Northern CA, its RARE for ANY WOMEN to wear skirts/dresses even in the warm summer months. It always wasn’t like this though UNTIL the early 90s or thereabouts. I wore dresses and pants throughout the 80s

  5. “A women’s place” should be wherever she wants it to be. If she likes cooking and nurturing and spending time in the house
    then that’s great; if not that’s great too. Your views on femininity are outdated. Every man and women should have the ability to choose the proper place in life for themselves. A women’s “proper place” is whatever place she chooses that will make her happy.

    1. If you have a humanistic worldview and believe that our purpose in life is to please ourselves and not our Creator, then yes – a woman’s “proper place” is whatever place she chooses that will make her happy.

      But if you believe, as I do, that we were not put here for ourselves but for the glory of our Father in heaven, and that His instructions which are found in the Bible are still valid for us today … then you know that it is only through obeying these instructions that we can find true happiness and fulfillment.

      The God who created us wants what is best for us and knows what is best for us … His plan is never outdated. When we submit to it, we will find joy and the peace that passes all understanding. When we choose to follow our own desires in contradiction of His instructions, we will only hurt ourselves and those around us.

    2. Dear Kaley..My youngest sister had pretty much the same mindset as you, and it was not until a few years before she died of cancer that she came to know Jesus as her Savior and she began to attend church and be changed. Before then, she lived a pretty rough life thinking she was her own woman and living on her own terms. During those years, she was divorced and married 3 times, lived with a man between divorces and he beat her, left her 2nd husband for a nut-case who later tried to kill her ex-husband and finally married a man who was so controlling that she had to set the dishes a certain way in the drain rack or she’d hear about it. Did she pray for God’s will concerning any of these men she brought into her life…..no. She was her own woman and did things her way. If she had done things God’s way, there would never have been but one man in her life. Sadly, she had to go through all this because she refused to follow her Creator. Happily, she came to know and love Him and her Savior and lived our the rest of her life in obedience to Him. I pray you will not be like her and wait so long and suffer so much before you will be obedient and submissive to your Creator and Savior.

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